Welcome To The Jungle: Deez Nuts and Koch-Fueled Candidates

Well it’s sure been a while since I posted something on here. Plenty of folks were wondering if I was running under the name ‘Deez Nuts’ a year or two ago when that candidate earned national attention as a write-in candidate. While I respect the chutzpah of Deez Nuts, I cannot claim any credit for his (or her?) work! The truth is that I’ve simply been more apathetic about American politics the last two years than ever before. When I started this project in 2013, I was inspired make a statement and add a new dimension to the upcoming election cycle – if only to amuse myself. While I’m no less intrigued by the idea of running as a write-in candidate, I’m unspeakably disappointed with how the field of candidates has winnowed itself down.

In a way this winnowing is exactly why I started this project. The absurd way in which our American political machine predictably reduces the field to two unlikeable candidates, every election cycle, never sat well with me. But whereas past candidates in previous cycles actually got my blood going (for better or worse), the field in this cycle doesn’t hasn’t excited me either way. And that is because they are SO BAD.

Never mind the circus that was the Republican candidate selection process. A pack of pathetic dim wits, pandering to deep pockets, like a bunch of spoiled rich kids asking their daddy for more money to go on a Koch-fueled four year bender (see what I did there Koch bros?). And let’s not talk about the Democrats, who have in gloating fashion reaped the benefits of an electorate more divided than ever. They have zero interest in unifying America, only in slashing it to pieces and turning us against one another. From both sides have emerged candidates so flawed, and so embarrassing as potential leaders, that I haven’t been bothered to expend energy or attention on them.

But I will acknowledge them briefly here. Donald Trump is a boorish blowhard who I can’t even imagine as the face of America. While I applaud THINGS about him, namely that he’s not beholden to any lobby and he comes not from the Washington machine, the ideas he formulates on his own are grotesque and dangerous. The last thing that man needs is more power. Hilary Clinton is an unabashed criminal who lacks any backbone or conviction whatsoever. She reminds me of the slick-haired manager we’ve all worked with who swims upstream by avarice and ass-kissing rather than merit and authenticity. She wouldn’t hesitate to send all of us downriver if it was expedient to her politically. That’s a fact folks. She cares about America – and Americans – even less than Michele Obama (is that even possible?!). The prize for her is a seat amongst equals in the Globalist regime. POTUS is a mere resume builder.

While the current political situation is PERFECT validation for my POTUS project, it has had the unexpected consequence of turning me off intellectually. So that is why there hasn’t been a flurry of blog posts or fervent damnation from my camp. I’ve also kept very busy with work and family but that’s no excuse because all of us are busy. This does not mean, however, that I’ve shuttered this project. Quite the opposite. I am in full swing filing candidate paperwork in various states. Some states – California in particular – changed their laws with regard to write-in candidates since I started this project. As a result, the patchwork of states I initially mapped out for 270 electoral votes no longer exists. It’s not impossible for a write-in candidate to secure that many electoral votes but frankly it will now take more time and than I have to give to the project.

So I’m focused on securing those states where I can devote reasonable time relative to their electoral voting value. In parallel, I plan to publish my stance on various issues (on this site) and ‘campaign’ throughout the fall. Campaigning, for me, will consist almost exclusively of tweeting. That’s right, I’ll be a digital paper tiger. So if you’re on Twitter, follow me @Sterner2016. I will be a loudmouth and have as much fun as I can at the expense of the mainstream candidates. In the interim get your popcorn ready for the big-tent party conventions, because there are sure to be fireworks and dysfunction!

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